. the good with the bad .

sometimes a little milk makes it all better

So now I’ve had 4 days to let the news of Dave’s job settle in my mind.  I’ve obviously had a range of emotions; as I’ve gone from scared to mad, to relieved, to peaceful I’ve realized that I have no control over the future.  I don’t know how this is going to play out, but I can trust that it will work out.  It will work out how it should and when it should.  All I can control is how I choose to react in the process.  And I can try my hardest to look for the positive – here are some positives that have come in the midst of the negatives:

- due to the circumstances of the company Dave was working for he was not given any severance.  BUT the night before we learned of his fate, Dave had our taxes done and we received a nice-sized tax return which will buy us (literally) a little time.

- Dave was scheduled to be out of town this weekend, which meant I was going to have the responsibility of taking 3 children to Stake Conference by myself.  As little as it seems, it sure was nice to have Dave there!

- stress & my body don’t generally work well together.  When I was having a super stressful moment, I happened to be on my way to the gym.  My trainer gave me some excellent exercises which he assured me were for relieving stress; I didn’t believe him, but I felt so great once I was done.

- so many friends and family have been super supportive – offering prayers, time, a listening ear, etc.

- because Dave took this job a year ago, we had insurance for Audra’s birth and for Dave’s cancer – HUGE!

- Dave has already had one job interview and has another set up for next week.  And the company he gave so much to was generous enough to allow him to keep his equity.

Without these positives, it sure would make a very stressful time much less fun!  Oh, one last highlight is we have a theme song, which just happens to be one of Logan’s favorite songs.  It is called “Waiting for the End” by Linkin Park; because really the hardest part of ending is starting again:

This is not the end
This is not the beginning,
Just a voice like a riot
Rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone
And the violent rhythm
Though the words sound steady
Something empty’s within ‘em  

We say Yeah!
With fists flying up in the air
Like we’re holding onto something
That’s invisible there,
‘Cause we’re living at the mercy of
The pain and the fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all disappear.

Waiting for the end to come
Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It’s out of my control….

Flying at the speed of light
Thoughts were spinning in my head
So many things were left unsaid
It’s hard to let you go…  

(Oh!) I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven’t got

Sitting in an empty room
Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to last,
I wish it wasn’t so…

(Oh!) I know what it takes to move on,
I know how it feels to lie,
All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven’t got

What was left when that fire was gone?
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it’s like moving on
And i don’t even know what kind of things I’ve said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead
So, picking up the pieces, now where to begin?
The hardest part of ending Is starting again!!

All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what i haven’t got…

This is not the end
This is not the beginning,
Just a voice like a riot
Rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone
And the violet rhythm
Though the words sound steady
Something empty’s within ‘em
(Holding on to what i haven’t got)

We say Yeah!
With fists flying up in the air
Like we’re holding onto something
That’s invisible there,
‘Cause we’re living at the mercy of
The pain and the fear
Until we dead it, Forget it,
Let it all disappear
(Holding on to what i haven’t got!)

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2 thoughts on “. the good with the bad .

  1. I’m sorry about Dave’s job. Always a scary thing. Let us know if there is anything we can do, it’s all about who you know sometimes in the job search world. We’re praying for you guys, good luck!

  2. Pingback: Extending Best Wishes #Kynetx

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